Rules and Regulations

When I was a young child my family and I lived in Seattle Washington. I remember that we would often take trips to see my Grandma and Grandpa that lived close to us. These trips were always enjoyable as we were able to grow close to them and get raised around them. One particular trip I remember, my cousin and his family were visiting my Grandma and Grandpa and I was extremely excited to see him because we were around the same age and it was always fun being around each other. I still remember the excitement I felt as we pulled up to my Grandparents house and he ran out to see my family and I. We all went inside and talked for awhile before my cousin and I got bored and we decided that we were going to go downstairs to play with the toys that my Grandparents had in their basement. This lasted for about an hour before we got bored again and decided that we wanted to go outside. I still remember sliding the glass door open in the basement and running outside to see what adventures awaited us in the neighborhood. We walked up the hill and down the hill again before stopping at a house across the street from my Grandparents. Living in Washington means that there were always pine cones on the ground and we both got the bright idea that we should start throwing these pine cones at a window on the shed next to the house across the street. We threw hundreds of pine cones before we decided that rocks would be a better alternative. I don’t remember which one of us threw the first rock but the window was shattered to pieces in no time at all and the next thing I remember were our parents running outside to their horror to see that their kids had been dumb enough to shatter a window with rocks for no reason at all.

I don’t remember much else from that day besides the fact that I was sent to a room for the rest of the day to think about what I had done and why that was never an OK thing to do even though it had been a lot of fun. What followed next though is something that has stayed with me to this very day. It was about a week later that I went back to my Grandparents house with my family and my Dad told me to stay in the car because we were going on a special trip. We took a trip to the local Home Depot and my Father informed me that we were going to fix the window that had been destroyed and I was going to give a personal apology for what I had done. I felt horror strike into my body as the gears in my head turned and I realized that I was going to have to take responsibility for what I had done. Facing the people that owned that shattered window was something that I had absolutely no desire to do. I would have much rather sat in my room for the rest of the week than have to go and face those people but face those people I did and the lesson my parents taught me with that has stuck with me for my time since.

My parents taught me that we always take responsibility for our mistakes. After that day I think I was a much better child because the fear of having to take responsibility for anything stupid I did was always hanging over my head. It wasn’t until I became much older that I realized what a valuable lesson that was and how much it has shaped me today. Parents tend to have different methods of disciplining their children and it is really in the eye of the beholder if those methods are effective or not. My parents taught me to take responsibility and that in turn was enough discipline for me because I never wanted to experience facing somebody in that sort of a situation again. What worked for me though may not necessarily work for my children someday and I wouldn’t be foolish enough to expect that there is some sort of fool proof way that just forces kids to be good. I really feel like it depends on the child and that every child has their own unique method of discipline that is effective for them and it is really up to the parents to figure out what that method is. Just like in my case, my parents decided that having me fess up to the people whose window I shattered was a good idea and taught me that valuable lesson of responsibility.

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Families…?

I remember when I was in 7th grade I was sitting in my typewriting class and listening to my friends talk about their divorced parents. “Mine got divorced when I was 6” “Mine got divorced when I was 10” “Mine separated before I was even born”. I sat there and listened to them talk about this until one of them turned to me and asked “How long have your parents been divorced Kent?” I stared blankly at them and replied “Oh mine are still together…” Not realizing how blessed I was to have that.

I thought about that for the rest of the day, thinking that I was somehow different or less than them because my parents were still together. In a world that had normalized divorce and was constantly attacking traditional families, was I even considered a part of a normal family anymore? It sure didn’t seem like it as I thought about how many of my friends parents had separated.

I had completely forgotten about that experience until I was on my mission and I saw once again how common it was for people to get divorced. I thought back to my own family at home with a renewed gratitude that my family had stuck together. We had experienced trials, sure, but we always came through them with a renewed closeness. It made me grateful and happy to think about my family back home as I witnessed the difficult effect divorce could have on a family.

It has been so saturated in our media today that we often times don’t even blink an eye at it anymore. How common is it for actors, athletes, and other celebrities to divorce? Just the other day I was on my way to school and over the radio they were discussing the divorce between Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner. They were talking about how they were going to have 3 houses, 1 for Ben Affleck, 1 for Jennifer Garner, and 1 for the kids. BA and JG would take turns at the kids house so that the kids wouldn’t have to go in between houses. How is that something that is good for the kids? I can’t even imagine my life without both my Father and my Mother together. I imagine it is difficult for the children to know that their parents aren’t together anymore.

I look at society today and a couple of things come to mind on the subject. The first one being that I have personally experienced the blessings that come from having a home that contains both a Father and a Mother. The second thing being how that is becoming more and more rare and how I need to be grateful for that.

I remember growing up and going through High School that I watched a lot of my friends parents get divorced and the effect that had on them. Every single one of them had similar thoughts on the matter and those thoughts were that is was hard. It was hard to watch their parents fight and argue and to go through a divorce. It was hard realizing that the only thing that tied their parents together anymore was the fact that they had children together. They said it placed a burden on them as they realized that their parents only reason for communication was because of them and that they often times felt like it would have been easier for them to not be around so their parents wouldn’t have to deal with each other anymore.

It really is sad that this is such a harsh reality of the world that we live in. It also makes me extremely grateful that I have such a wonderful family and I know that divorce doesn’t always need to be the answer. My parents are living proof that marriages can be happy and successful and that families really are happiest when we stick together.

Families CAN be together. We just have to work hard for that to happen.

 

My Classmates Blogs

Introduction

These are the blogs for all my classmates in my Family Relations class this semester. Feel free to follow along with their blogs as they will be discussing similar material to what I will be writing about.

Their Blogs

Austin Lee – http://kidsmyto.blogspot.com/

Becky Gietzen – https://prettyprettyirishp.wixsite.com/justlive

Kaylie Winninger – https://loveathome2017.wordpress.com/

Jordan Wolff – http://jordanwolffblog.wordpress.com

Rebecca Anderson – http://thafamilymatters.blogspot.com/

Anabel Vela – http://anabelvela.blogspot.com/

Megan Greenman – http://strengtheningfamiliesblog.wordpress.com/

Dillan Birch – https://ohanadrama2peculiarpeople.wordpress.com/

Kristen Helsing – https://bethefirstblue.wordpress.com/

Esther Deakin – http://familylifeadventure.weebly.com/

Madi Voyles – http://makingthefamilywork.blogspot.com/

Shad Geist – runsinmyfamily.wordpress.com

Shayla Bates – http://taketimetotalk.weebly.com/

Marissa Holtz – https://mycouchpotatoblog.wordpress.com/

Amanda McGuire – https://familiesare4everblog.wordpress.com/

Jacob Atwood – discoveringfamilyblog.wordpress.com

Sarah Black – http://boundtogetherforeternity.weebly.com/blog

Rocio Reyes – https://changingfamilies.wordpress.com/

Samuel Tarlton – http://mynewblogsamwise.blogspot.com/

Kristen Smith – http://smittyrocks17.blogspot.com/

Marc Burnside – https://thetruthaboutfamily.wordpress.com/2017/04/21/first-blog-post/

Brianna Murray – http://brimurray7551.weebly.com/blog

Sydney Barber – http://sydney800.blogspot.com/

Krystin Ulassin – https://futuremrsadamsblog.wordpress.com/

Kylie Clement – http://clemky.blogspot.com/

Jessica Curtis – https://peachesnprayers.wordpress.com/

Kali Machuca – staystrong23blog.wordpress.com

Julie Bingham – https://sharealittleloveblog.wordpress.com/

Rachel Adams – https://bayareamormon.wordpress.com/

Teigan Miller – https://teiganmiller.wordpress.com/

Becca Owen – https://beccaowenblog.wordpress.com/

Peyton Scow – familymatters531.wordpress.com

Alex Escobar – http://insidemymessycerebrum.blogspot.com/

Sadie Myers – https://letsbefrankaboutfamilies.wordpress.com/

Kaylie Winninger – https://loveathome2017.wordpress.com/about/

Jared Pierce – jaredwhatisfamily.blogspot.com

Alyssa Roberts – makefamilylifebetter.blogspot.com

Harmony Garfield – http://afamilyinharmony.weebly.com/

Ali Duncan – http://searchingformyforever.weebly.com/

Jordan Jewkes – http://jordansblogaboutnothing.blogspot.com/

Taylor Araujo – http://callmecrazyblamemyfam.blogspot.com/