Ever since I was a child I have created many memories of something called Family Council. These have always been councils we had as our family debated major changes that could potentially be coming to our lives in the next couple of months. One particular Family Council that comes to mind happened when I was 15, when my Father came home from work to tell us that he had received a job offer that would be taking us from our home in Syracuse, UT to the unknown land of Frisco, TX.
I was unsure as how I should react to this because I wanted nothing to do with Texas. I had spent the last 5 years of my life in Utah and was very comfortable with how everything was going. I remember it was a Monday night that my Father asked us to sit down so that we could discuss this potential move. He had done this with every move that we had had previous but this was the first one that I was old enough to feel like really effected me in a big way. The last move we had done had been when we moved from Washington to Utah and I was only 10 years old and hadn’t put down roots like I had in Utah.
We all sat down and my Father raised the question to my siblings and I on how we felt about potentially moving to Texas. I was adamant in my response that I did not have any desire to move anywhere and I especially didn’t want to move to Texas because we had never been there before and we had no friends or family that we would be close to. My Father listened to each one of our opinions and took them into account but ultimately decided that the best move for our family would be for us to go to Texas.
This started a pattern that I noticed over the years. I don’t have any recollection of us doing anything major without talking about it as a family first. We haven’t always done what I wanted to do but I have appreciated the fact that my parents have always involved my siblings and I in those types of decisions. It wasn’t until a couple of weeks ago that I realized that this isn’t the case in many families around the world.
It seems to be more typical for families to be dominated by either the parents or the children. That either the parents are always in charge or the parents are push overs and the children run the family. There is a balance that is necessary for families to have harmony and it involves the parents and the children being equally involved on the decision making process while realizing that the parents still have the final say. Yes it is important for the kids to have a say but the parents in the end have the final say.
It seems to me that families would be much better off if they had something like this in place. It doesn’t always have to be to make major decisions but it can be used to solve issues in the family that may arise. They overall point of these councils is to discuss matters of importance in the family. It really comes down to having clear and effective communication that can allow families to grow together and overcome issues that come to the forefront.
If we do these things then all families will be placed in a position to grow together and overcome anything that comes up. All it takes is a little bit of effort and some clear concise communication.